I have had a terrible time sleeping this week. It’s a combination of anxiety, occupation of the mind at late hours, restlessness, and of course, my screwed up sleeping schedule during my lengthy vacation last week.
I keep thinking and dreaming about death. Not some kind of symbolic “death really means rebirth!!1″ thoughts and dreams, but […]

You may have noticed that there was no resolution to the Thanksgiving series. Honestly, and as noted here around day four or so, I ran out of significant things to be thankful for. I still posted, but those posts were bordering on mockery. “I give thanks for pie”, “I sure am thankful for plastic silverware”, […]

I take it back. My brain has turned against me once more. I’m tired of your games. I’m tired of being alone. I’m tired of being mediocre. I’m tired of being me.
I’m just tired.
I’m going to retreat.
See ya.

I’m not feeling very thankful today. I’m not thankful for wondering why I don’t deserve what other people take for granted, and I’m not thankful for knowing the exact reasons why I don’t deserve it.
Fuck.
I dream of things I’ll never have and things I’ll never have again. I dream about all of the people I’ve […]

Today, I give thanks for Village Inn’s delicious apple pie, and the ubiquitous scoop of vanilla ice cream that accompanies it.
Now, if you will excuse me, I’m going to vegetate for several hours and then sleep the sleep of the morbidly obese.

I’m out of things to be thankful for. Yesterday was pushing it.

I’ve had trouble coming up with something to be thankful for today. There seems to be a wide variety of subjects to choose from, but most are patently false and only seem ripe for praise because my state of mind is upbeat (relatively) as of late. A couple are too private to share here, which […]

Last night, or this morning, rather, I woke up crying at around 5:30am. I had a horrible dream, very similar to the worst dream I have ever had. This is what I jotted down after I stopped sobbing like a little girl:

Continuing the holiday warm-and-fuzzies blitzkrieg began yesterday…
I’m thankful for the family I have left. Mother, father, stepfather, sisters and one cousin-slash-sister, hereby dubbed custard. Uncle, aunt, cousin. Roughly one half of what formerly was the “family.”
There are things that I know I can count on from these people. I can call my mom, spur of […]

For a very large portion of my life - 23 years, in fact - Thanksgiving and Christmas were profoundly important to me. I looked forward to the months of November and December with much zeal and anticipation all year long. It was the time of year when, no matter what was going on between my […]

I dislike discussing politics with people. My views on the subject are… unpopular, to say the least. I make it a point to respect other peoples’ opinions, for two reasons: I believe they believe whatever it is they believe for a reason, and I don’t believe that it’s my place to try to supplant their […]