Sometimes life is so surreal.
Under no circumstances would my life ever be taken seriously. I drift from one self-imposed ridiculous situation to another, by virtue of some psychotic desire to be different, quirky, at the very least noteworthy, since I can’t seem to respect whatever talents I may have.
After days of spending money on a […]

“A man whose sense of shame has some profundity encounters his destinies and delicate decisions, too, on paths which few ever reach and of whose mere existence his closest intimates must not know: his mortal danger is concealed from their eyes, and so is his regained sureness of life. Such a concealed man who instinctively […]

“He enters into a labyrinth, he multiplies a thousandfold the dangers which life brings with it in any case, not the least of which is that no one can see how and where he loses his way, becomes lonely, and is torn piecemeal by some minotaur of conscience.”

Why do I retain so much guilt for […]

I’ve decided I’m going to disappear for a while.

I just want to be different. Not necessarily different from the world at large, I think I’ve got that covered. I want to be different from me.
I’ve tried, in the past 6 months, to change small things about myself. I thought that if enough small points were realigned, myself as a whole would shift. I […]

I wrote this long entry yesterday about loss and death and my ability, or lack thereof, to deal with each. But I saved it instead of publishing immediately, and today it seems silly. So I want a do-over.
I’ve lost a lot over the past 6 months.
Most notably her and an entire life that revolved around […]

It’s been a while since I really said anything here.
…
I don’t even really know where to begin.
It’s been a bad week for boyfriends. I count no less than 5 female friends either ending their relationships or teetering dangerously close to the edge of them. It irritates me to see people taking these things for granted, […]