…is the one-year anniversary of me meeting Jamie in the flesh. We knew each other for around 9 months before that, while she was in Seattle. My first communication with her went as follows:
DodecahedronSPC: jamie says “wassup bay-bay”
DodecahedronSPC: lol
jrisadork: oh my
jrisadork: i blush in response
DodecahedronSPC: she picks her nose in response. I love jamie
jrisadork: haha
jrisadork: […]

This is strangely hypnotic.

Found here.

I hate everyone and everything.
I’m not in the fucking movie. CJ is.
Aside from that, I thought it was pretty good. It was pretty suspenseful, the effects were great. The ending was a bit cheesy but, despite what Jady thinks, I thought it made a lot of sense.
But I still hate everything. Fuck.

I’m afraid of this place. Haven’t been here since.. the whole Bobbi thing. I always end up hurting myself here.
Will she care? When she saw me beating myself up earlier, she just left. When I got in the car to leave, she didn’t even look. I just sent her a text message, and she didn’t […]

All I want is to be the most important person to someone. To be treated like I’m the most important person to someone. I had that with Jamie… For a good 7 or 8 months. We had a few fights, but they were almost always over small things, and caused by me making too big […]

…have been the saddest that I can remember.
I’m slowly realizing the many layers of problems that are pushing Jamie and I apart.
I saw today that I’d fallen into the same trap I always get myself into… People not understanding me at all, thinking I’m something I’m not, for whatever reason, and being attracted to that […]

Jamie should be on her way to Florida right now.
I honestly didn’t want her to go. After I dropped her off I found myself wishing that there would be some problem with the booking or something and I’d have to turn around and pick her up.. But that didn’t happen. So I’m gonna spend the […]

http://www.toxic.no/php/vis_film.php?id=82

Does anyone else think that Jamie’s tattoo looks like an ass taking a shit?

I’ve been making engine changes as time has permitted. Mostly little things.. Getting rid of old stuff that I don’t use anymore, trying to slim it down a bit.. Timezones are working now, but you can’t edit your profile to say which timezone you’re in anyway, so….
I’m going to implement sessions to handle a […]

We’ve been fighting nearly constantly over the past couple of months. We’re both guilty of a lot of miscommunication and behaving childishly. But I think this weekend we worked some things out, and both admitted some things to each other and ourselves. Hopefully things will improve from here forward.
A large part of the problem centered […]

Seth put in his two weeks notice on Monday.
I’ve worked with or for him for 4 or 5 years. He’s helped me out quite a bit, and looked out for me here a lot.
I’m glad that he’s moving on to better things. He’s been unhappy here for quite some time, and the raise is substantial.
Still, […]

I’ll admit that I had extremely high expectations going into this. Christian Bale is one of my favorite actors and is extremely adept at playing the dark, brooding, conflicted role. And Christopher Nolan is a pretty good director. Memento is one of my favorite movies.. Insomnia was decent, but not nearly as fresh and original.
I’ll […]

Tomorrow I will post at length on the following subjects:
Batman Begins
We saw the midnight showing tonight. Overall, I liked it, but I was expecting something very different.
Seth leaving c.o.r.m.i.n.e
I’m happy for him, because he hasn’t been happy there for quite some time, but I’m worried about how it’s going to affect me.
Problems with Jamie
I think […]

Worst weekend ever.

I can only think straight when I’m distracted.
Today, I had to go to a movie (alone, for the first time ever. Sad, huh?) just to be able to think without going crazy or overboard.
I generally only get to think about things when I’m watching a movie, or tv, or driving, or reading a book.
Otherwise, I […]

Disliking life greatly these past few days/months. I’m tired of all of the bullshit.
And, by all accounts, it’s just going to get worse.
I’m divorcing life. “I reject your reality and substitute my own.”

Undoubtedly, the last month or so has been a very exhausting time.
Lately, I’ve been bombarded with opinions on my current situation with Jamie, and they all say basically the same thing. As much as I disagree with what is being said, I’m not so arrogant as to write them off completely. Contrary to popular belief, […]

I’m not sure what to do right now.
Jamie expects me to only care about her well being when she thinks it’s warranted. Anytime I express concern about something she’s doing that she doesn’t already see as a problem, she gets extremely defensive.
Tonight, for example. She decided to go to The Wave, even though she needed […]

A friend of mine works at this tie place and put this up. Hahaha.

I’ve been quite unhappy lately. I’m having trouble pinning down the reason, exactly.
It’s not Jamie, though she does tend to make things much worse. It’s not my living situation; I like my townhouse and I like the area. It’s not money, really. Things are good on that front, though thinking about the sheer number of […]