things on my mind
she doesn’t care..
my life is nothing like the lives of those on TV. when i have problems, no one comes running, worried. no one cries. no one cares. they only care when it’s convenient for them. and i don’t blame them. how can i expect anyone to care? i’m not worth it. better to just write me off and move on with your life.
i’m very sad right now. i’ve apparently fallen into a vicious cycle:
morning groggy, unresponsive
noon oblivious to my problems for the most part, somewhat happy
night when i’m alone- constant sadness. when i’m with cj and (not or) joanna, happiness at first, declining into severe sadness. i don’t know why.
fuck this shit. i don’t want to live my life as a burden on others, needing constant cheering up and ego boosting. the countdown starts tonight. you’ve got 2 weeks.
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Anonymous User
8 hours, 44 minutes later
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Floris Leenders
12 hours later
shes right u know jr.
u are in a sort of paradox right now, u obviously want attention yet u dont want to burden people.. this is possibly also the cause for your depression, u are at odds with yourself.
and dont try to lie to yourself by saying that u dont want attention.. everyone wants attention..if u want our help dont be afraid to ask, i know that sounds sappy but thats what we are here for, i mean its not a burden unless u want it to be. as im sure your aware youve helped us out in numerous occasions..
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JR Smith
12 hours, 17 minutes later
i don’t care. please stop reading this.
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JR Smith
13 hours, 24 minutes later
what i want is for it to end.
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Floris Leenders
15 hours, 39 minutes later
i dont believe u
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JR Smith
20 hours, 23 minutes later
i dont care
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Floris Leenders
20 hours, 49 minutes later
you should
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JR Smith
22 hours, 48 minutes later
dutch people suck.
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Floris Leenders
1 day, 7 hours later
how so
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Floris Leenders
1 day, 7 hours later
cj and his damn silloetted ass
2 weeks for what? who has two weeks to do what? you have always been very adament about making sure nobody comes running or even knows when there is a problem. if it weren’t for the web site i would have no clue because you don’t want me to. who doesn’t care? everybody cares, but you are so standoffish that nobody has the nuts to say anything to you or ask questions. i watch your moods, and you’ve been sleeping a lot lately. quite frankly i’m sure that your insurance will cover a therapist and i think you need to look into seeing one. obviously you need to talk to someone who could possibly interpret your dreams and help you get out of this black hole you are in. i’ve tried and i don’t think i’ve made any impact on you at all, good or bad. people are worried about you and you seem to be enjoying that. intead of wallowing in self pity maybe you should pull yourself up and talk to a professional. you can’t be a burden on others unless you make a conscious choice to do that. other people are a part of your life to cheer you and boost you, if they didn’t then why would they even exist. if we were meant to be alone we would not need other people to reproduce the species. makes no sense to you i’m sure, i don’t suppose it even matters, you don’t care what anybody else says anyway.