MAN work is boring today… there is absolutely nothing going on here, and it’s driving me insane. the thing i *used* to like about this job was the fact that it kept me occupied 90% of the time so i couldn’t stop and think about my crappy life and all the crappy stuff going on in it… this is no longer true. i’ve been thinking about this weekend alot today, i’m so nervous i am starting to feel physically ill from it. i’m trying to think of anything i can do to make myself even the slightest bit more attractive, or in this case less disgusting for her. as if my own insecurities aren’t enough cj has informed me that she seemed excited about seeing me, so the pressure is on bigtime. and what’s worse, this wednesday is valentine’s day and i am contemplating getting her something… arrrggggggg why can’t i be good at this?? why can’t i be dashing and charming?? i think i deserve it… i just need to think of ways to calm down and relax a little… maybe i’ll drink some passoa before i see her or something. i dunno, that’s probly not a good idea. my stomach is burning….